I am not sure if I can properly express the gratitude I feel for the support this blogging community has given me - and I am humbled by how many people "come to the rescue" at a time when you really need it most. This was never more apparent to me than it was yesterday.
As I am sure most of you already gathered, yesterday morning I had been feeling pretty low and my post certainly reflected that. There was an incredible amount of self-doubt and disappointment I was allowing to grow inside of me, and I knew it was affecting my whole way of thinking about losing weight. But I wanted to be honest with everyone about how I felt (at that moment) in terms of where I am both physically and mentally in this journey. One thing I never want to do here is lay down some BS that has everyone thinking my weight loss journey is all rainbows and bluebirds and pots of gold when in reality, it's the exact opposite. That does me absolutely no good, and it would defeat the purpose of blogging entirely. I pretty much wear my emotions and thoughts on my sleeve, or in this case, on my computer screen, so rest assured, you'll always know "the real skinny" about what's going on here in Fatville, NJ.
With that said, I never expected so many supportive, inspiring and motivating comments to come out of such a "downer" post - but I am extremely grateful to those who replied because it made a world of difference for my psyche both yesterday afternoon and today (the replies are still coming in!).
What I love best is that many of you gave me the tough love I so desperately needed - but you also did so with a kindness and compassion that I don't ever recall getting from people I have never met in the flesh (or even family members when it came to my weight issues - my cousin Andrea excluded - she is an awesome cheerleader!!!). You all told me what works for you (which I asked for), you gave me great suggestions on how to better organize my eating plan so that failure isn't an option, you gave me online tools I can use to help track what I eat, you gave me the offer of one on one support if I needed it, you confirmed that this is NOT an easy ride and that you understand what this is like and why it's important to take control, and overall all, you just showed me that you care and are invested in my success too. And a few of you even asked me some very tough questions I have been too afraid to ask myself. Michele at Ruminations and Uncovering: Toward a New Me grabbed me with this particular question: If not now, when?
I stared at those words for a little while and repeated them to myself aloud. If not now, when? When I think of the magnitude of that question, it really blows my socks off and I'll tell you why. When I was a teenager, I told myself by the time I was 20, I would have my weight under control. When I hit 20 and my weight continued to balloon, I thought age 25 would be the magic number and I would finally look and feel the way I wanted. When I turned 25, and nothing had changed, I was sure by my 30th birthday I could beat this problem. Age 30 came and went and so did 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38 and 39. I am now just about 3 months from my 40th birthday, weighing 229 pounds, which is about 6 pounds less than my highest weight ever. If not now, when?????
Time stands still for no one - I have learned this the hard way. I am so tired of playing the "weighting" game with myself that I know the answer to Michele's question is this: The time IS now. All of those "if not now, when?" moments have come and gone....I have no more time to spare. I'm am doing this NOW.
There is so much more I could write about this, but I am not dwelling on the past, because it gets me nowhere. I just wanted you all to know that your comments are not in vain - I have gained valuable gems from them and am thankful you gave the time to stop by and offer your support.
And just so you know I am true to my word, I DID jump back into the Shred yesterday, and I was right - it was hard. Not as hard as Day 1 though. Apparently it takes more than 3 days for your body to go completely back to hell. I got up an did it again this morning, followed by an hour walk with my husband and the dogs.
I feel like a new woman today.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Monday, September 26, 2011
Derailed
Ugh....is it Monday already?????
It's been a doozie of a weekend, folks. And I don't mean in a good way....or maybe I just mean, not in a good way for weight loss. More on that later....
I know I've been missing from my blog for a few days and that's because if I WAS sitting at my computer these past few days, it was for the sole purpose of doing homework. I had a paper and lesson plan to tackle and so if anything at all was going to get typed by these little sausage fingers, I felt those two things took precedence. I still have some tweaking to do on both projects before I go to class this evening, but decided to first spend a couple of minutes playing catch up in Blogland.
So, Monday is the Christmas Dress Challenge Update Day where we share our (a-hem) progress....
What can I tell you other than I continue to struggle daily with weight loss. Something in my head has not clicked the way it is supposed to. I don't know if this is because it's the umpteenth million time I have tried to do this, or if I just am focused on other things right now. What I do know is that my heart and soul has not been 100% into the game. And that is just the truth. I continue to write about it and keep this blog because I feel it helps me in some respect, but part of me has to ask, "What's it all for if you aren't going to commit yourself fully???? People do not want to hear about your failed attempts."
I was on a kick-ass streak with the 30 Day Shred but it has been three, yes THREE days since I have done the workout. I know when I go to do it today (and I will), it will feel like Day 1. But I am going to do it!
Although I have not Shredded for 3 days, I have taken walks with my husband and the dogs (usually close to 60 min a pop) - so I have not been a sloth on the couch all weekend either. Water consumption (64 oz) was on track until yesterday....I only got in about half of that. (And thanks to everyone commenting about the pee thing, by the way! Who knew it was such a popular topic?? Ha!).
The real trouble I am having is with tracking food....it is the thing I need to be MOST accountable for, and yet, it is really where I hit a wall. I thought that hopping back on the WW train was the way to go, but I am not so sure now. Each day as I lose track of what I eat, I feel like a huge failure. I have always faltered when I had to write down absolutely everything I eat....Yeah, you read this correctly, and so many of you are probably ready to slap me through your computer screen while screaming, "Duh!!!" I realize what I just wrote is the dieter's #1 golden rule. Know exactly what you are putting in your mouth and how much it's going to "cost you." Here is where I should be having that "A-ha", or as I like to call it, "No Shit!" Moment where I say to myself - "Well, this is why you haven't lost any weight! You MUST be held accountable for what you eat." And I know this....really, I do.
So, my question today is this: For those of you that are religious about tracking your food - do you count calories or do WW points? Tell me what you like best about your method of keeping your food portions/intake "in check" and how you approach this each day.
My problem isn't necessarily that I don't know how to do these things....it's simply that I am doing them a bit half assed at the moment and it shows in the lack of weight loss I have had for months now. This past Friday (which is technically my official weigh day), the scale didn't budge from last week (holding steady at 229.25), despite my commitment to the Shred. So on Friday, I think I weighed in, got frustrated, wallowed a bit and then went off the rails....completely. There may or may not have been alcohol and Oreos involved.
What amazes me is how I can fall so quickly. I can be a powerhouse for days, feeling great, working hard at keeping things on the up and up - and then BOOM. I get lazy, and let things slide. Again, I know this is no way to conduct myself or handle this beast within.....I feel like for the past few days I have let "it" get the best of me, and I don't know why. Every time this happens (you get that this is not an uncommon occurrance, right?), it's like I am saying to the universe I really don't give a rat's ass about myself. And while I know in my heart of hearts that's not true, the actions say otherwise.
So that's what has been going on with me these past few days (aren't you glad you asked?).....just here fighting some familiar demons and hoping that eventually I will find my way back to a better mind set - because this one??? Totally not working for me.
It's been a doozie of a weekend, folks. And I don't mean in a good way....or maybe I just mean, not in a good way for weight loss. More on that later....
I know I've been missing from my blog for a few days and that's because if I WAS sitting at my computer these past few days, it was for the sole purpose of doing homework. I had a paper and lesson plan to tackle and so if anything at all was going to get typed by these little sausage fingers, I felt those two things took precedence. I still have some tweaking to do on both projects before I go to class this evening, but decided to first spend a couple of minutes playing catch up in Blogland.
So, Monday is the Christmas Dress Challenge Update Day where we share our (a-hem) progress....
What can I tell you other than I continue to struggle daily with weight loss. Something in my head has not clicked the way it is supposed to. I don't know if this is because it's the umpteenth million time I have tried to do this, or if I just am focused on other things right now. What I do know is that my heart and soul has not been 100% into the game. And that is just the truth. I continue to write about it and keep this blog because I feel it helps me in some respect, but part of me has to ask, "What's it all for if you aren't going to commit yourself fully???? People do not want to hear about your failed attempts."
I was on a kick-ass streak with the 30 Day Shred but it has been three, yes THREE days since I have done the workout. I know when I go to do it today (and I will), it will feel like Day 1. But I am going to do it!
Although I have not Shredded for 3 days, I have taken walks with my husband and the dogs (usually close to 60 min a pop) - so I have not been a sloth on the couch all weekend either. Water consumption (64 oz) was on track until yesterday....I only got in about half of that. (And thanks to everyone commenting about the pee thing, by the way! Who knew it was such a popular topic?? Ha!).
The real trouble I am having is with tracking food....it is the thing I need to be MOST accountable for, and yet, it is really where I hit a wall. I thought that hopping back on the WW train was the way to go, but I am not so sure now. Each day as I lose track of what I eat, I feel like a huge failure. I have always faltered when I had to write down absolutely everything I eat....Yeah, you read this correctly, and so many of you are probably ready to slap me through your computer screen while screaming, "Duh!!!" I realize what I just wrote is the dieter's #1 golden rule. Know exactly what you are putting in your mouth and how much it's going to "cost you." Here is where I should be having that "A-ha", or as I like to call it, "No Shit!" Moment where I say to myself - "Well, this is why you haven't lost any weight! You MUST be held accountable for what you eat." And I know this....really, I do.
So, my question today is this: For those of you that are religious about tracking your food - do you count calories or do WW points? Tell me what you like best about your method of keeping your food portions/intake "in check" and how you approach this each day.
My problem isn't necessarily that I don't know how to do these things....it's simply that I am doing them a bit half assed at the moment and it shows in the lack of weight loss I have had for months now. This past Friday (which is technically my official weigh day), the scale didn't budge from last week (holding steady at 229.25), despite my commitment to the Shred. So on Friday, I think I weighed in, got frustrated, wallowed a bit and then went off the rails....completely. There may or may not have been alcohol and Oreos involved.
What amazes me is how I can fall so quickly. I can be a powerhouse for days, feeling great, working hard at keeping things on the up and up - and then BOOM. I get lazy, and let things slide. Again, I know this is no way to conduct myself or handle this beast within.....I feel like for the past few days I have let "it" get the best of me, and I don't know why. Every time this happens (you get that this is not an uncommon occurrance, right?), it's like I am saying to the universe I really don't give a rat's ass about myself. And while I know in my heart of hearts that's not true, the actions say otherwise.
So that's what has been going on with me these past few days (aren't you glad you asked?).....just here fighting some familiar demons and hoping that eventually I will find my way back to a better mind set - because this one??? Totally not working for me.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
With This Pee, I Thee Shed?
Hello peeps!
I'm supposed to be writing a paper for one of my classes but am finding it difficult to really get into it (what's new?). I know it has to be done, and I have a lesson plan that is next in line once the paper is complete - yet here I am futzing around on the computer doing anything but what I am supposed to be doing. Oh Lord, if you only knew just how typical that was of me. My friend (who happens to be a special ed teacher and is therefore quite familiar with the subject) confirmed my self-diagnoses for having Adult ADD. I swear, my ability to stay focused sometimes (as in a lot of the time) SUCKS.
Adding to my issues of not being able to stay focused is all this damn water I have been drinking. For those of you that regularly drink upward of 80 - 100 oz a day, how do you do it? I am CONSTANTLY up and down from my chair, back and forth to the bathroom because I have to pee. Like we're talking waterfalls of pee that I cannot believe my bladder can even hold....Please tell me this stops after a while. I mean, I am willing to pee my brains out if it means shedding some weight - but holy smokes is it inconvenient!
I'm sticking to my challenge goals, though - despite my raging desire to throw on a pair of Depends so that I can stay put in my chair for longer than a 30 minute stretch. I'm guzzling 64 oz of pure water - plus more liquids throughout the day - primarily in the form of coffee, but hey - that counts, right? I'm also tracking WW points, and getting in my 30 minutes of exercise. Yesterday it was the Shred and an additional walk, today it is the Shred and I promise, I will walk again a little later.
Speaking of the Shred, I'm still trudging through! Monday I did not do the DVD because my back was acting up (disc issues - so not fun) but I figured out that it was mainly the bicycle crunches that were causing me pain for whatever reason. Not to be deterred, I got back on the horse yesterday so for the past 2 workouts (Tues & today) I just did a regular crunch combined with a reverse crunch during that last abs segment which seemed to alleviate the pain a bit (or at least not intensify it, anyway). What is encouraging to me is the difference I notice in myself (endurance-wise) now that I have completed Day 12 versus my struggles in the beginning. Even the jumping jacks are getting easier. And I NEVER thought I'd say that.
Technically this is supposed to be the last day for Level 1, but I am not sure I am ready to move on (mentally or physically) - however, I am willing to try if others who are doing the challenge are also sticking to the proposed schedule. Give me a shout and let me know how you are doing!! I am willing to suffer along and call Jillian even more harsh names in Level 2 if you are!
That's about it...just a wee little update (no pun intended). I'm sending good vibes out to everyone else to kick some butt and stick with your goals. I also want to thank everyone for their comments and support. You guys make this weight loss thing (*almost*) enjoyable - LOL.
I'm supposed to be writing a paper for one of my classes but am finding it difficult to really get into it (what's new?). I know it has to be done, and I have a lesson plan that is next in line once the paper is complete - yet here I am futzing around on the computer doing anything but what I am supposed to be doing. Oh Lord, if you only knew just how typical that was of me. My friend (who happens to be a special ed teacher and is therefore quite familiar with the subject) confirmed my self-diagnoses for having Adult ADD. I swear, my ability to stay focused sometimes (as in a lot of the time) SUCKS.
Adding to my issues of not being able to stay focused is all this damn water I have been drinking. For those of you that regularly drink upward of 80 - 100 oz a day, how do you do it? I am CONSTANTLY up and down from my chair, back and forth to the bathroom because I have to pee. Like we're talking waterfalls of pee that I cannot believe my bladder can even hold....Please tell me this stops after a while. I mean, I am willing to pee my brains out if it means shedding some weight - but holy smokes is it inconvenient!
I'm sticking to my challenge goals, though - despite my raging desire to throw on a pair of Depends so that I can stay put in my chair for longer than a 30 minute stretch. I'm guzzling 64 oz of pure water - plus more liquids throughout the day - primarily in the form of coffee, but hey - that counts, right? I'm also tracking WW points, and getting in my 30 minutes of exercise. Yesterday it was the Shred and an additional walk, today it is the Shred and I promise, I will walk again a little later.
Speaking of the Shred, I'm still trudging through! Monday I did not do the DVD because my back was acting up (disc issues - so not fun) but I figured out that it was mainly the bicycle crunches that were causing me pain for whatever reason. Not to be deterred, I got back on the horse yesterday so for the past 2 workouts (Tues & today) I just did a regular crunch combined with a reverse crunch during that last abs segment which seemed to alleviate the pain a bit (or at least not intensify it, anyway). What is encouraging to me is the difference I notice in myself (endurance-wise) now that I have completed Day 12 versus my struggles in the beginning. Even the jumping jacks are getting easier. And I NEVER thought I'd say that.
Technically this is supposed to be the last day for Level 1, but I am not sure I am ready to move on (mentally or physically) - however, I am willing to try if others who are doing the challenge are also sticking to the proposed schedule. Give me a shout and let me know how you are doing!! I am willing to suffer along and call Jillian even more harsh names in Level 2 if you are!
That's about it...just a wee little update (no pun intended). I'm sending good vibes out to everyone else to kick some butt and stick with your goals. I also want to thank everyone for their comments and support. You guys make this weight loss thing (*almost*) enjoyable - LOL.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Christmas Dress Challenge - Goals & Dresses
Ok, I realize I am just getting my post in for the Christmas Dress Challenge by the skin of my teeth, but I'm here and I have my info and pics, as promised.
I have given some serious thought to goals and what I'd like to accomplish in the next three months and how I am going to achieve these changes. Because this challenge runs simultaneously with the 30 Day Shred Challenge (until mid Oct) I am combining some of my goals I set for that along with this challenge.
I like the fact that this particular challenge is 3 months long, taking us through what I consider to be the hardest time of the year for weight loss. It's what I call the Triple Threat and it starts with Halloween, which will be here before we all know it. Boo, indeed!
Ok, so here are the dresses:
This dress I bought last year in Oct as a possible rehearsal dinner dress but didn't end up wearing it. I thought I could wear it for our honeymoon in Dec, but by then I didn't feel comfortable in it. Rest assured, it's not a maternity dress, but it sure as hell looks like one on me (see pic below). The goal here is to wear this dress without someone asking me when I'm due.
It is size 16W. I'm currently riding the 1X, 18W or 18/20W train depending on the style/cut.
The next dress I selected I have had in my closet for a few years. It's an XL (probably not accurate sizing but that's the manufacturer's fault, not mine) and I have always envisioned myself wearing this with some sexy knee-high patent leather boots. I bought it when I was probably close to 205 - 210 pounds but it never really fit that well. I thought with the magic of Spanx it would look OK, but my confidence must have taken a nose dive because I never wore it. I don't think that by Dec 18 this dress is going to look perfect on me by a long shot, but the goal for this dress isn't to have it fit perfect, but more so to have some of my body lumps and bumps smoothed out so the design doesn't look so ripply. I'm sure I'll continue to work on the "wearability" of this dress long after the challenge is over.
As for the meaty goals for this challenge, here they are:
I have given some serious thought to goals and what I'd like to accomplish in the next three months and how I am going to achieve these changes. Because this challenge runs simultaneously with the 30 Day Shred Challenge (until mid Oct) I am combining some of my goals I set for that along with this challenge.
I like the fact that this particular challenge is 3 months long, taking us through what I consider to be the hardest time of the year for weight loss. It's what I call the Triple Threat and it starts with Halloween, which will be here before we all know it. Boo, indeed!
Ok, so here are the dresses:
 |
| Looks so much better on the hangar than hanging on my body. |
This dress I bought last year in Oct as a possible rehearsal dinner dress but didn't end up wearing it. I thought I could wear it for our honeymoon in Dec, but by then I didn't feel comfortable in it. Rest assured, it's not a maternity dress, but it sure as hell looks like one on me (see pic below). The goal here is to wear this dress without someone asking me when I'm due.
It is size 16W. I'm currently riding the 1X, 18W or 18/20W train depending on the style/cut.
 |
| As a matter of fact, no, I'm not expecting. But thanks for asking. |
The next dress I selected I have had in my closet for a few years. It's an XL (probably not accurate sizing but that's the manufacturer's fault, not mine) and I have always envisioned myself wearing this with some sexy knee-high patent leather boots. I bought it when I was probably close to 205 - 210 pounds but it never really fit that well. I thought with the magic of Spanx it would look OK, but my confidence must have taken a nose dive because I never wore it. I don't think that by Dec 18 this dress is going to look perfect on me by a long shot, but the goal for this dress isn't to have it fit perfect, but more so to have some of my body lumps and bumps smoothed out so the design doesn't look so ripply. I'm sure I'll continue to work on the "wearability" of this dress long after the challenge is over.
 |
| Goal: Make those lines on the waist STRAIGHT! |
1) I have made a BIG decision to do WW online and try tracking points (again). This is not something I had originally planned but after some heavy consideration, I am going to give it 3 solid months of effort and see if it gives me some decent results. I need accountability. Desperately.
2) I also will make sure to get in 30 minutes of exercise in 5 days a week. In one little secret corner of my brain, I am hoping for 7 days a week but this may be difficult and I want to make sure I am setting realistic goals. Let's face it, sometimes life gets in the way.
3) I will drink 64 oz of water a day. I have been BAD with getting in my H2O, so this is something I really want to do!
4) Weight loss goal - 20 lbs. Enough said.
My measurements can be found on my 30 Day Shred page. They were just taken a few days ago, so I consider them valid for this challenge as well. More than likely, I'll post weekly weigh ins and monthly measurement updates.
That's about it for now....
Hope we all end up on Santa's Nice list by sticking to our goals this year!
Merry Challenge Everyone!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
If You're Shredding And You Know It, Clap Your Hands!
Hello friends!
It's a lovely sunny Sunday afternoon here in NJ and I've got some Coconut Curry Butternut Squash Soup from Skinnytaste.com simmering on the stove and have sent my hubby off to the grocery store for a whole chicken I plan to roast to compliment the soup and roasted balsamic cauliflower already planned for dinner. Rachellabelle at My Hips Don't Lie had posted the yummy sounding soup recipe a short while ago on her blog, and I immediately snagged it and printed it so I could make it once some cooler temps kicked in here. Well, the temperatures sort of cooperated, although it's not quite as brisk a day as originally planned for eating this kind of (healthy) comfort food - but, no matter, I'm making that soup anyway!
For those of you that have never visited skinnytaste.com, you really need to. Sooner rather than later! I'm not trying to go all 'high school peer pressure' on you or anything, but trust me, when you are having your first foodgasm over one of her recipes, you'll know what I am talking about. This website is awesome, especially if you are following Weight Watchers because Gina (the culinary goddess behind the recipes) has done all the hard work for you. Everything has been calculated out in both the old points system, as well as the new points plus system. Hey, I bet Jennifer Hudson is a fan! I personally am not doing WW, but sometimes I think I should, just because this website makes it so damn easy - no guesswork! :-) I like that.
So - you know I am not doing WW, but can I tell you about what I am doing? For starters, I'm still kicking ass and taking names with the 30 Day Shred Challenge. It's Day 10 for me!!!
Yeah - get up off the floor - I'm just as surprised as you are that I have stuck with this.
And not only have a I stuck with it - but I am beginning to (gulp)... even like it....a little. My biggest *holy shit* moment was yesterday when my commitment to this thing became glaringly apparent. I opted for getting up early and getting in my workout before I had to leave to take my Praxis Exam, over sleeping in. I chose to set my alarm for 6:00 on a Saturday and sweat via exercise before I had to sweat through taking my exam...(BTW - I think I did OK on the test, but I won't get my score back for 4 weeks - so stay tuned). Since most of you guys only know me through the blogosphere, you may not grasp the importance of this NSV - but sadly - this is not something I would have ever imagined I would have done in the past - and we are talking the relatively recent past. In the untimely words of the United States Vice President Joe Biden, "This is a big f*cking deal." (I posted the link of our VP's verbal faux pas here if you have never seen it). Better yet, I kept the promise to myself that I would get some additional exercise in, beyond the Shred, to kick up the calorie burn. Granted, the other exercise (an hour walk with my hubs and the dogs) was done in the early evening, long after the Shred was completed, but I got it done nonetheless.
This morning when I got up, it was my husband's turn to surprise me when he said he wanted to join me in doing the Shred. He had just returned from a mile run (he's easing back into running after going through a year long issue with an broken ankle that didn't heal properly) so I was impressed that he even entertaining the idea. Usually I am not a "share my workout with others" type of person. I like to work out alone. When I used to go to the gym in NY, I never wanted to talk to anybody while I was there. My thinking was this: I had one purpose for me being there and that was to grunt, sweat like a wild boar in heat, and look about as unattractive as possible while making my body do things it was uncomfortable doing - I was not there to make friends. But since my husband has already seen me at my best and worst, I made a concession and allowed him to join me, Jillian and her 2 workout cronies for our daily shred. I figured at the very least he'd get a real kick out of watching my boobs hit my eyebrows as I did the jumping jack segment. Isn't that every guy's biggest fantasy? Uh, Not.
Well, today the crazy workout junkie in me emerged. I really kicked it into high gear. Maybe it was the show off in me, maybe it was because I really feel like I want to up my game - but either way, I really made my body work today under Jillian's command. I started to incorporate some real push ups into the work out instead of just the girly ones (5 total today!!) and I only took ONE 3 second break. I did *real* jumping jacks the whole time but am still modifying the jump rope move slightly ( I sort of jog in place now). All in all, I feel some good progress being made which is encouraging. It also felt good to know the workout kicked my husband's ass too, so I think he may have gained a whole new appreciation for me taking on this challenge. After finishing the Shred, we went on another hour and 10 minute walk. It feels so great not breaking that promise to myself to get in the extra exercise. I have done that kind of promise-breaking self-sabotage crap so often that I am trained to think it's the norm. It's what I have come to expect of myself. But these past 2 weeks have taught me that I CAN stick with something - and the expectations I set for myself should be so much higher.
That's about it for today. Goals met! Happy with my progress! Content with this new way of thinking! I'm trying to get the eating thing under control too (and I definitely need to start drinking more water)....maybe I shouldn't be so cavalier with dismissing the WW idea....I know so many people that are rocking it right now. Could I? Should I?
Tomorrow I will post about my goals for the Christmas Dress Challenge being hosted by Thursday's Child. I have to dig out my dress, take a pic, see how badly it doesn't fit, and think a little bit more about the goals I want to set for this challenge.
I'm feeling unstoppable today....Damn, I hope it lasts!
It's a lovely sunny Sunday afternoon here in NJ and I've got some Coconut Curry Butternut Squash Soup from Skinnytaste.com simmering on the stove and have sent my hubby off to the grocery store for a whole chicken I plan to roast to compliment the soup and roasted balsamic cauliflower already planned for dinner. Rachellabelle at My Hips Don't Lie had posted the yummy sounding soup recipe a short while ago on her blog, and I immediately snagged it and printed it so I could make it once some cooler temps kicked in here. Well, the temperatures sort of cooperated, although it's not quite as brisk a day as originally planned for eating this kind of (healthy) comfort food - but, no matter, I'm making that soup anyway!
For those of you that have never visited skinnytaste.com, you really need to. Sooner rather than later! I'm not trying to go all 'high school peer pressure' on you or anything, but trust me, when you are having your first foodgasm over one of her recipes, you'll know what I am talking about. This website is awesome, especially if you are following Weight Watchers because Gina (the culinary goddess behind the recipes) has done all the hard work for you. Everything has been calculated out in both the old points system, as well as the new points plus system. Hey, I bet Jennifer Hudson is a fan! I personally am not doing WW, but sometimes I think I should, just because this website makes it so damn easy - no guesswork! :-) I like that.
So - you know I am not doing WW, but can I tell you about what I am doing? For starters, I'm still kicking ass and taking names with the 30 Day Shred Challenge. It's Day 10 for me!!!
Yeah - get up off the floor - I'm just as surprised as you are that I have stuck with this.
And not only have a I stuck with it - but I am beginning to (gulp)... even like it....a little. My biggest *holy shit* moment was yesterday when my commitment to this thing became glaringly apparent. I opted for getting up early and getting in my workout before I had to leave to take my Praxis Exam, over sleeping in. I chose to set my alarm for 6:00 on a Saturday and sweat via exercise before I had to sweat through taking my exam...(BTW - I think I did OK on the test, but I won't get my score back for 4 weeks - so stay tuned). Since most of you guys only know me through the blogosphere, you may not grasp the importance of this NSV - but sadly - this is not something I would have ever imagined I would have done in the past - and we are talking the relatively recent past. In the untimely words of the United States Vice President Joe Biden, "This is a big f*cking deal." (I posted the link of our VP's verbal faux pas here if you have never seen it). Better yet, I kept the promise to myself that I would get some additional exercise in, beyond the Shred, to kick up the calorie burn. Granted, the other exercise (an hour walk with my hubs and the dogs) was done in the early evening, long after the Shred was completed, but I got it done nonetheless.
This morning when I got up, it was my husband's turn to surprise me when he said he wanted to join me in doing the Shred. He had just returned from a mile run (he's easing back into running after going through a year long issue with an broken ankle that didn't heal properly) so I was impressed that he even entertaining the idea. Usually I am not a "share my workout with others" type of person. I like to work out alone. When I used to go to the gym in NY, I never wanted to talk to anybody while I was there. My thinking was this: I had one purpose for me being there and that was to grunt, sweat like a wild boar in heat, and look about as unattractive as possible while making my body do things it was uncomfortable doing - I was not there to make friends. But since my husband has already seen me at my best and worst, I made a concession and allowed him to join me, Jillian and her 2 workout cronies for our daily shred. I figured at the very least he'd get a real kick out of watching my boobs hit my eyebrows as I did the jumping jack segment. Isn't that every guy's biggest fantasy? Uh, Not.
Well, today the crazy workout junkie in me emerged. I really kicked it into high gear. Maybe it was the show off in me, maybe it was because I really feel like I want to up my game - but either way, I really made my body work today under Jillian's command. I started to incorporate some real push ups into the work out instead of just the girly ones (5 total today!!) and I only took ONE 3 second break. I did *real* jumping jacks the whole time but am still modifying the jump rope move slightly ( I sort of jog in place now). All in all, I feel some good progress being made which is encouraging. It also felt good to know the workout kicked my husband's ass too, so I think he may have gained a whole new appreciation for me taking on this challenge. After finishing the Shred, we went on another hour and 10 minute walk. It feels so great not breaking that promise to myself to get in the extra exercise. I have done that kind of promise-breaking self-sabotage crap so often that I am trained to think it's the norm. It's what I have come to expect of myself. But these past 2 weeks have taught me that I CAN stick with something - and the expectations I set for myself should be so much higher.
That's about it for today. Goals met! Happy with my progress! Content with this new way of thinking! I'm trying to get the eating thing under control too (and I definitely need to start drinking more water)....maybe I shouldn't be so cavalier with dismissing the WW idea....I know so many people that are rocking it right now. Could I? Should I?
Tomorrow I will post about my goals for the Christmas Dress Challenge being hosted by Thursday's Child. I have to dig out my dress, take a pic, see how badly it doesn't fit, and think a little bit more about the goals I want to set for this challenge.
I'm feeling unstoppable today....Damn, I hope it lasts!
Friday, September 16, 2011
I Am Not A Leper - I DO NOT Have Malware!
Hello peeps!
I am having an issue (that actually has nothing to do with weight loss believe it or not).
I am not sure what is going on with my blog and I'm a little concerned. I received a troubling comment from Thursday's Child that there is a message when you try to view my blog that says I have Malware and it could be preventing folks from reading it. I am pretty sure I don't have any type of Malware attached to my blog or computer and checked through Google diagnostic which confirmed that my site was A-OK. When I tried to access my blog from my husband's computer, I did not get any message pop up indicating I had it so I have no clue what is going on. I have a Mac that is relatively safe from this type of thing.....yet I can't help but wonder if others receive this message when trying to get to my blog? I know that I got the message when I tried to get to view Katie J's Weight Loss Journey and Watch My Butt Shrink - but I never opened their blogs pages for fear there was something bad lurking out there.
I am sooooo not a techie so I really am frustrated about this. If anyone knows of how to properly check to see if this is really happening to my blog, I'm all ears. You can send me an e-mail at dirtymartini34@yahoo.com
Thanks!
Now on to other news (for those of you that can still read me here without fear of my blog imploding your computer): I was awarded a my very first blog award yesterday by Becca at Size 24 No More. I was very flattered to receive this, as I haven't exactly been setting the world on fire with my weight loss. But I am tickled that she nominated me and gave a shout out to the fact that I am kicking ass in the 30 Day Shred....(will get to that later).
Anyway - Becca has given me the Liebster Blog Award!
I am having an issue (that actually has nothing to do with weight loss believe it or not).
I am not sure what is going on with my blog and I'm a little concerned. I received a troubling comment from Thursday's Child that there is a message when you try to view my blog that says I have Malware and it could be preventing folks from reading it. I am pretty sure I don't have any type of Malware attached to my blog or computer and checked through Google diagnostic which confirmed that my site was A-OK. When I tried to access my blog from my husband's computer, I did not get any message pop up indicating I had it so I have no clue what is going on. I have a Mac that is relatively safe from this type of thing.....yet I can't help but wonder if others receive this message when trying to get to my blog? I know that I got the message when I tried to get to view Katie J's Weight Loss Journey and Watch My Butt Shrink - but I never opened their blogs pages for fear there was something bad lurking out there.
I am sooooo not a techie so I really am frustrated about this. If anyone knows of how to properly check to see if this is really happening to my blog, I'm all ears. You can send me an e-mail at dirtymartini34@yahoo.com
Thanks!
Now on to other news (for those of you that can still read me here without fear of my blog imploding your computer): I was awarded a my very first blog award yesterday by Becca at Size 24 No More. I was very flattered to receive this, as I haven't exactly been setting the world on fire with my weight loss. But I am tickled that she nominated me and gave a shout out to the fact that I am kicking ass in the 30 Day Shred....(will get to that later).
Anyway - Becca has given me the Liebster Blog Award!
"Liebster" means "favorite" or "beloved" in German.
This award is for bloggers who have under 200 followers (that's me, for sure).
So now I get to spread the love and award this to 4 of my favorite bloggers! Go check out their blogs and read their story. They promise to inspire you, make you laugh, make you think and get you motivated!
Here goes:
First I award Rachellabelle at My Hips Don't Lie because she is out there making WW her b*tch! She has dropped over 40 pounds in about 21 weeks and is looking gorgeous! She just hit a plateau so for any of you with experience with how to kick start weight loss when the pounds won't budge, no matter how hard you're working, go visit her blog and give her a pep talk and some good advice!
My second award goes to Shala at Follow Me Down. She and I are riding similar weight rollercoasters at the moment - we are both hovering around the same weight and like to cheer each other on with "Let's Just Do This Thing Already." I love her blog because I relate to her down to earth sensibilities and approach to weight loss.
My third award goes to Liz at The Feel Better Project who has vowed to workout everyday for at least 30 minutes over the course of one year. You know how easy it is for life to get in the way of working out sometimes so this commitment is no joke. This girl may not have have the type of junk in her trunk that you or I are trying to lose but she does have dedication and determination and I like her approach to working out. JUST DO IT! And she has a great writing style and is funny, so - win/win!
My last (but not least) award goes to MB at Why The Weight. This woman has truly been instrumental in allowing me to adjust my thinking in terms of how I approach weight loss. She has lost almost 100 pounds through a very sensible "slow and stead wins the race" approach and is still striving to hit that goal of 101 pounds lost. She is inspiring, enlightening and gives me hope that I can beat this fat demon too...I just love her.
That's it....those are the peeps I bow to this week. You all deserve props - so I'm giving them.
In other news - just a quick update on the weigh-in (it is Friday, after all) and 30 Day Shred Challenge.
Today I completed Day 8 of the Shred!! Yey, me! I have to tell you that yesterday was a struggle to get through it and I totally said "F*#@ it" when it came to the last round of ab exercises (those bicycle crunch suckers are the devil - and my herniated disc REALLY doesn't like them). Today's workout, although better than yesterday by a mile, still kicked my ass sideways. I think having "The Curse" right now has a lot to do with it. Working out while there's an exorcism going on in your uterus and your body feels about as inflated as a Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade balloon isn't the most ideal of situations for Jillian to pound you into submission - but I am proud of myself for plugging on through....(seriously, did I just say plug?)
However, even with The Curse, I am happy to say that i am still showing a loss for the week. Happy Days are here again, as the scale makes its way in the right direction this week. Granted it's only 1.75 pounds, but beggars can't be choosers - so I'm good with it. Hell, I am better than good with it. I'm thrilled. It could have been worse.
Anyhoo - hope the rest of you 30 Day Shredders are feeling the burn! I have to go study for my Praxis Exam that I am taking tomorrow morning....I haven't really stuck to my study schedule as I had planned. Wish me luck I pass this thing (it is crucial)!!!
Until tomorrow......
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
5 Steps Forward, Two Steps Back
I have just one thing to say about Jillian Michaels.
She does not take kindly to people who take days off from her Shred workout. And dissing it 2 days in a row? Hmmm... that may be punishable by death in her book.
I think I may be dead meat.
So, let me give you the scoop on what's been going on with me and the 30 Day Shred Challenge....I was busting ass like a rock star with it for 5 full days BEFORE the official challenge even started. I was feeling awesome and the workout was becoming less of a dread and more of, well, just a challenge. I felt my mindset changing - I wanted to push myself - I wanted to prove once and for all that I was capable of doing something that in the past would have scared the bejesus out of me. I listened to Jillian encouraging me through the TV and I did what she told me to do. Don't give up. Keep pushing. In the words of the Biggest Loser theme song, I was starting to really feel that there was something I had done today to make me feel proud.
Then, on the day I was SUPPOSED to officially begin (Sept 12), I fumbled - big time (enter loud BOOO-HISSSSS here). I like to do this workout in the AM because it gets me moving and I feel good knowing I have that bit of exercise, at the very least, under my belt for the day. But on Monday morning I knew my in-laws would be coming by to drop their rather rambunctious 4 year old golden retriever mix off at our house so they could head to Rochester, NY for a funeral. I spent the morning trying to frantically clean the house up, do dishes, vacuum, clean the bathroom - all things that could have been put on the back burner for the morning until after my workout - but I wanted to make sure I had time to get it all done before they arrived. I didn't want my MIL to think I don't know how to properly "keep house" (It's such a 50's mentality but I can't help it). Suffice it to say, the place looks pretty good right now!
By the time they arrived, I had already done a full "housewife workout" and was literally sweating my ass off. My MIL even asked me if I had been exercising! "Ugh, no, not exactly. Just trying to prevent you from seeing that I may not be the world's biggest neat nick. P.S. - Neither is your son, by the way. I think you know this about us already, but at times, we do like to keep up the illusion for you."
By the time Henry (their dog) and our three furry babies got reacquainted it was quite the dog-fest, a literal canine carnival if you will, right in our living room (aka my workout space) until they finally got settled. Since they arrived right about the time I would normally be getting ready to pop in my DVD, I could tell my opportunity to do my workout was going to hell in a hand basket in a wicked hurry And it did. In the back of my mind, I knew I had other (not necessarily bigger) fish to fry. I had a ton of school work these past two days so that unfortunately took precedence over everything else. Even yesterday, while there was no major doggie diversion to get in my way, I woke up at 5:30 and immediately began working on school stuff and didn't stop until about 3:00 when it was time to get ready for class. Another day of working out, down the drain.
Well, I am here to say - No More! I know that this challenge is important and I need to treat it, and my weight loss goals, with the respect that they deserve. Because to me, this is not just a fun little challenge that I am doing simply for the hell of it. I realized that today as I got back into the work out (technically Day 6 for me with a 2 day break in between Days 5 and 6). I am doing this because I NEED to. This is no joke.
I am curious how many of you have taken full body shots of yourselves lately? I know many of you do, but some might not. And some might take them but not post online. It's a personal choice - I totally understand. For me, taking these pictures are real eye openers (that admittedly make me want to quickly shut my eyes tightly closed again). I took some again today (and measurements too, because I was feeling particularly self-depreciating this morning) that I uploaded, post-workout and my God, they just never fail to horrify me. These pictures remind me that I have some serious - no I mean F*%#@!G SERIOUS - work to do. They remind me that this 30 day Shred Challenge is just the tiniest, teeniest tip of my big, fat iceberg. They remind me that I still need to do so much MORE than this DVD, and I'm working on that, too. My goal for this challenge is to get an additional 60 or more minutes of exercise in - whether it is at my college gym (I found out they have showers - YEY!!!), a walk in town, working out on my elliptical here at home, another workout DVD (I may actually be starting to really enjoy these things) or a combination of those. It just needs to be done. End of story.
It's going to mean getting up early. And it's going to mean finding an eating solution that makes sense and works for me. I think I need to get back to calorie counting as much as I hate to admit it. I am not eating horribly, but I still need to work on those portions. This is all still such a work in progress.
Anyway, that's my update. I'm back in the saddle and did Day 6 of Level One. It was admittedly harder today. I'm serious when I say it doesn't pay to take time off from this thing. I swear Jillian has a way of knowing.
Hope everyone else is kicking some ass today. I'm off to the grocery store to load up on some good eats for the week. See you all looking slimmer and feeling better at the end of this 30 days!
She does not take kindly to people who take days off from her Shred workout. And dissing it 2 days in a row? Hmmm... that may be punishable by death in her book.
I think I may be dead meat.
So, let me give you the scoop on what's been going on with me and the 30 Day Shred Challenge....I was busting ass like a rock star with it for 5 full days BEFORE the official challenge even started. I was feeling awesome and the workout was becoming less of a dread and more of, well, just a challenge. I felt my mindset changing - I wanted to push myself - I wanted to prove once and for all that I was capable of doing something that in the past would have scared the bejesus out of me. I listened to Jillian encouraging me through the TV and I did what she told me to do. Don't give up. Keep pushing. In the words of the Biggest Loser theme song, I was starting to really feel that there was something I had done today to make me feel proud.
Then, on the day I was SUPPOSED to officially begin (Sept 12), I fumbled - big time (enter loud BOOO-HISSSSS here). I like to do this workout in the AM because it gets me moving and I feel good knowing I have that bit of exercise, at the very least, under my belt for the day. But on Monday morning I knew my in-laws would be coming by to drop their rather rambunctious 4 year old golden retriever mix off at our house so they could head to Rochester, NY for a funeral. I spent the morning trying to frantically clean the house up, do dishes, vacuum, clean the bathroom - all things that could have been put on the back burner for the morning until after my workout - but I wanted to make sure I had time to get it all done before they arrived. I didn't want my MIL to think I don't know how to properly "keep house" (It's such a 50's mentality but I can't help it). Suffice it to say, the place looks pretty good right now!
By the time they arrived, I had already done a full "housewife workout" and was literally sweating my ass off. My MIL even asked me if I had been exercising! "Ugh, no, not exactly. Just trying to prevent you from seeing that I may not be the world's biggest neat nick. P.S. - Neither is your son, by the way. I think you know this about us already, but at times, we do like to keep up the illusion for you."
By the time Henry (their dog) and our three furry babies got reacquainted it was quite the dog-fest, a literal canine carnival if you will, right in our living room (aka my workout space) until they finally got settled. Since they arrived right about the time I would normally be getting ready to pop in my DVD, I could tell my opportunity to do my workout was going to hell in a hand basket in a wicked hurry And it did. In the back of my mind, I knew I had other (not necessarily bigger) fish to fry. I had a ton of school work these past two days so that unfortunately took precedence over everything else. Even yesterday, while there was no major doggie diversion to get in my way, I woke up at 5:30 and immediately began working on school stuff and didn't stop until about 3:00 when it was time to get ready for class. Another day of working out, down the drain.
Well, I am here to say - No More! I know that this challenge is important and I need to treat it, and my weight loss goals, with the respect that they deserve. Because to me, this is not just a fun little challenge that I am doing simply for the hell of it. I realized that today as I got back into the work out (technically Day 6 for me with a 2 day break in between Days 5 and 6). I am doing this because I NEED to. This is no joke.
I am curious how many of you have taken full body shots of yourselves lately? I know many of you do, but some might not. And some might take them but not post online. It's a personal choice - I totally understand. For me, taking these pictures are real eye openers (that admittedly make me want to quickly shut my eyes tightly closed again). I took some again today (and measurements too, because I was feeling particularly self-depreciating this morning) that I uploaded, post-workout and my God, they just never fail to horrify me. These pictures remind me that I have some serious - no I mean F*%#@!G SERIOUS - work to do. They remind me that this 30 day Shred Challenge is just the tiniest, teeniest tip of my big, fat iceberg. They remind me that I still need to do so much MORE than this DVD, and I'm working on that, too. My goal for this challenge is to get an additional 60 or more minutes of exercise in - whether it is at my college gym (I found out they have showers - YEY!!!), a walk in town, working out on my elliptical here at home, another workout DVD (I may actually be starting to really enjoy these things) or a combination of those. It just needs to be done. End of story.
It's going to mean getting up early. And it's going to mean finding an eating solution that makes sense and works for me. I think I need to get back to calorie counting as much as I hate to admit it. I am not eating horribly, but I still need to work on those portions. This is all still such a work in progress.
Anyway, that's my update. I'm back in the saddle and did Day 6 of Level One. It was admittedly harder today. I'm serious when I say it doesn't pay to take time off from this thing. I swear Jillian has a way of knowing.
Hope everyone else is kicking some ass today. I'm off to the grocery store to load up on some good eats for the week. See you all looking slimmer and feeling better at the end of this 30 days!
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