Reset, Ready, Go!

I'm siting here with a steaming cup of coffee, contemplating all of the work I have to get done at home today. I have my second appointment with the trainer at the gym at 12:00 this afternoon, and I STILL have yet to go to the grocery store which is absolutely, positively, 100% imperative to get done today considering the food choices in this house for the past 5 months have been less than stellar. Give me something green! Give me something leafy! Kiss those crunchy, chippy, snacky, Stacey's Naked Pita chips goodbye! They really are the devil.

While I'm still working on getting back into making those automatic, healthy food choices, I have had consistent exercise since last Wed. I've walked every morning, except today, because I need to make sure my knees are in fighting shape for my training session today. I have found that I am still getting sore/stiff in my joints when I walk and I am not sure if it's because I am doing 2.5 - 3.1 miles out of the gate or what? My husband is a firm believer in the "jump right back into it -  hard core," while I feel I should ease back in - I don't want to overdo it and then feel lousy like my knees did yesterday after our 3.2 miles. He walks at least a 5K a day and thinks I should be able to do the same, even though I am just getting back into a walking routine. I'm Ok while I'm doing it, but that long of a walk pretty much wipes out any other cardio gym activities I'd be doing later. I can't seem to "elliptical it up" after walking a 5K in the morning. I just get so tight in the joints - it's uncomfortable. Not painful - just uncomfortable. And frankly, I'd rather do the elliptical because I know it's a better calorie burn, but I hate telling my husband I can't walk with him - it's a nice morning thing we can do together. Maybe I just need to divide up my week - some days walk, others get my cardio in at the gym. Ah, compromise.

They do offer Zumba at the gym but I feel VERY nervous about joining that right away. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't last 10 mins. Same goes for spinning. I feel like I have to build up some major stamina first. I will say that the fitness test I had on Friday was a real eye opener as far as my "lack of fitness level" was concerned. Not that I really expected otherwise, but the news that the trainer gave me was depressing to say the least -  and, as if staring the need to lose 100 pounds in the face isn't daunting enough, knowing JUST how out of shape you are and how MUCH is wrong with you is like throwing another pie in the face. My road seems SO long and SO challenging, I often wonder when I will ever get to the place I need to be. This fitness test really threw me for a loop, if I am being perfectly honest. I had never had my body fat percentage or endurance or balance tested before. While the process itself is rather humiliating, it does inspire me to change those initial readings/results. It gives me a "restarting" point, so to speak. I just wish I could get results quickly, which I know isn't realistic. The challenges I face are not things that can be resolved overnight. They can't even be resolved in a month...or two. Sure, I can increase my endurance in that time and lose weight - but the overall me won't be radically changed in that time. This all takes time and patience - I need to keep reminding myself of that. Rome wasn't built in a day and changes to my body and fitness levels won't happen in that time frame either. I guess what I am trying to say in a very whiny and annoying way is that it just sucks starting over, that's all.

Ok, I'll stop bitching about it now.

I continue to be inspired by those that ARE making the changes I need and want to make.  Your words keep me going in the right direction and make me realize that everyone starts (or restarts) somewhere - everyone has their beginning point. Technically this is mine (again). I do feel like I am starting this process anew, even though I have been through it what seems like a million times already.

Here's to a million and one.