I'm staring out my window at a steady downpour and a sky so gloomy it practically demands an afternoon nap. I just have to ask...is this any way to spend the unofficial last day of summer? I think not.
Yet, here I am inside, working on (ugh!) homework and watching the rain, wishing I was doing anything but the afore mentioned activities.
I'd be lying if I didn't admit that the grey gloom of the weather kind of mirrors the mood I have been in for the past couple of days. One look at my "Chub Reduction Meter" to the right of my blog, and you can probably guess why. Maybe I should re-title it to read Chub Induction Meter???? With yet another pound added to my ass for this week, I'm thinking I'm less suited for writing a weight loss blog, but maybe the Paula Dean Fan Club would be happy to have me?
I'm not here to sugar coat things (maybe Splenda-coat is more apropos for our group?) - I've been on a roll around here (pun intended - I think it's a hot dog roll to be exact). It isn't pretty, friends. I'm not sure exactly what it was that sent me over the edge (School starting? Hurricane Irene?? My dwindling bank account??? My mentor teacher backing out of our agreement for my last 30 hours of observation at the last minute????) but without a doubt, I seem to have found myself in some kind of evil place that forced me to leave my better judgement at the door and feed my panic and stress with things that aren't exactly on anyone's "healthy eating list".
Yesterday was the first day I didn't feel akin to Alice falling down the rabbit hole, and realized that in the light of day, strawberry cream pie is not the answer to my stress, and that I need to get a grip, and get refocused. I must say that all of the comments I received from Thursday's post helped TREMENDOUSLY! Thank you from the bottom of my (no doubt artery clogged) heart. I asked for some ass kicking, and I got it - in a gentle, supportive way. I see all of you working so hard to meet your goals and I know that if I want to remain a viable member of this blogging community, I best start showing up to the game, if you know what I mean. And I think you do.
The funny thing is, that even with the less than stellar eating, I HAVE been walking - quite a bit actually. Today is the first day I have missed a morning walk since last Tues or Wed. So, yes, some calories have been burned - but they have also been consumed. Oh, yeah they have. And so I have been giving the Fall Challenge a bit more thought. I'm sort of doing the Amp challenge (I think), in that each day I have met my 3 miles (except today, which I can still do on the treadmill) - but I haven't been timing myself or doing anything else other than logging distance - and I haven't been officially posting anything about it because I guess I don't know the exact details of the challenge or what I should be doing. Still, a three mile walk, is a three mile walk - so I won't discount my exercise - even if it's not following official challenge rules.
I still fear Jillian like she is the devil herself - and although I am not sure of the exact details of her workouts, if the Biggest Loser is any indication, I am pretty sure squats, jumps and other demands-of-the-knee-type exercises are a part of it. My biggest fear is that my knees may not accommodate those types of exercises, if the clicking and cracking mean anything. But after reading the reviews of the DVD, I have decided I need to go balls to the wall, and in the words of Nike and Rachellabelle at My Hips Don't Lie, "Just Do It!!!" With that said, I am going to join Taryn at Fat Girl in a Skinny World and Miss April at 30 Before 30 in the 30 Day Shred Challenge starting September 12. Wish me luck.
Taryn, if you're reading this, I WILL be e-mailing you for details!!!
So that's really it in a nut shell - I'm trying to take the advice of those that have paved the "weigh" before me and have shown me that my choices dictate my success. I'm sending a special shout out to MB at Why The Weight? for being especially inspiring and encouraging. She has taught me to take a moment to ask myself if the choices I am making will benefit me in reaching my goal. One decision, one choice at a time. I can honestly say, since the end of July, I had not been asking myself that question - and it shows on the scale. So, thank you for the virtual ass kicking - Lord knows I needed it!
And really, thank you to EVERYONE who takes the time to read my blog and leave a comment - your words means more than you know!
Ok - whew - feeling better already. (Amazing what a little cyber-therapy can do for a gal).
Let's get this fat-shedding party started for good!